I am finally back again. I was in Illinois attending a friend's wedding and visiting my Bestest Friend in the WHOLE World (Gayle). I spent the night at my sister's on the way up there and on the way back in order to break up the trip and hang out with Sis, her hubby and niece. Sis was ready to party when I got to her house on Sunday on my way home but I was so exhausted from staying up late, drinking and waking up early for 3 nights in a row that i could barely keep my eyes open. I managed to stay "fun to be around" but I started getting more and more tired and Sis got more and more tipsy. I love her a lot and get along with her better than anyone else I know (I think I mentioned before that she is my sister by choice, not by blood. If not, leave me a comment and I'll revisit that story) but she can really say some crazy things when she drinks.
Our conversation kept going back to the time I spent at Gayle's house for a few days and Sis blurted out that she would never go back to Gayle's house with me after the last time I took her up there with me last year... That puzzled me a little bit as well as offended me in a way. She continued to explain how she thinks my friend Gayle is a wonderful person but has no clue about hospitality the way we understand it. She didn't offer us breakfast the last time we were at her house at all. I told Sasha that this statement was a little offensive to me because Gayle is my good friend but she is right... No matter how tired, busy and/or hungover Sis and I may be, we would always make sure our guests are properly fed and taken care of. Gayle has two little kids to chase around and she just doesn't eat much herself, so it is never a priority for her. I realize that and I let that go because she is so wonderful in all other aspects but I do wonder if it really is a cultural thing or not.
In my culture, if a person comes to your house, even for 5 minutes, you offer him/her everything you have to eat and/or drink; if he/she is staying at your house overnight, the guest always gets the best sleeping accommodations even if it means you sleeping on the kitchen floor. That's how I grew up, that's what I live by...
Not sure if I made any sense. Just rambling...
Our conversation kept going back to the time I spent at Gayle's house for a few days and Sis blurted out that she would never go back to Gayle's house with me after the last time I took her up there with me last year... That puzzled me a little bit as well as offended me in a way. She continued to explain how she thinks my friend Gayle is a wonderful person but has no clue about hospitality the way we understand it. She didn't offer us breakfast the last time we were at her house at all. I told Sasha that this statement was a little offensive to me because Gayle is my good friend but she is right... No matter how tired, busy and/or hungover Sis and I may be, we would always make sure our guests are properly fed and taken care of. Gayle has two little kids to chase around and she just doesn't eat much herself, so it is never a priority for her. I realize that and I let that go because she is so wonderful in all other aspects but I do wonder if it really is a cultural thing or not.
In my culture, if a person comes to your house, even for 5 minutes, you offer him/her everything you have to eat and/or drink; if he/she is staying at your house overnight, the guest always gets the best sleeping accommodations even if it means you sleeping on the kitchen floor. That's how I grew up, that's what I live by...
Not sure if I made any sense. Just rambling...
3 comments:
I'm with you on this one. In my culture, to be a good hostess, you take care of your guests. You go out of your way to make sure they're comfortable, that they have good food to eat, etc. Unless they're really close friends and you just let them help themselves! LOL!
I do have friends like your friend, and initially, it made me feel weird and awkward that there was no "hospitality" given! LOL! I grew up much like you with the hospitality thing (though I'm sure our backgrounds are much different! LOL! You're not Spanish-Filipina-Caribbean-Chinese, are you? LOL!). Anyway, I just figured I had to live with the way things were with my friends who weren't as hospitable. I think I only have one or two friends who are like that though. Most people generally make sure that their guests are comfortable (towels, bed, food, breakfast, etc). Ah well.
Sounds southern to me...I don't cook, so I hit Chick-fil-A by house for visitors.
Hi Monkey!
It could just be a personal thing with Gayle... like, if she's dead on her feet while chasing her two monste... I mean, kids, around, I'd forgive her for not giving me sustenance, if I were a good friend. But then again, if I were her BESTEST friend in whole wide world, I'd be in her kitchen and raiding her ref and cabinets for something to drink and eat, for both myself and whoever it is I brought along to her place.
And, food is a GOD in my culture, so it's an absolute necessity whenever someone comes over to visit one's place. Just check out Chrissy's blog! :))
Post a Comment